I remember how I used to just kinda disconnect and feel nothing, think about whatever in situations where a strong emotional reaction would seem more than reasonable, like I'd get angry now and then or I could get happy from something but it wasn't a problem. I guess it sounds strange but it's like in about the last 5 years or so I've been more and more developing emotions much like the normals, I have real feelings now and that can be pretty awful in a world like this. I've been depressed for a while, I try to be happy though, life's hard for me in ways it isn't for most people and that makes me feel like such a child. I can't live without pills but it's hard to live with them too mainly because of how my head feels all cloudy all the time. I can't drive. I've come on here a bunch of times trying to think of what to write but it takes me too long to articulate my thoughts so I end up giving up. I haven't been sleeping that great a couple hours a night if I'm lucky, my doctor cut me off a few months ago of clonazepam and now it's like there's nothing I can do or say to get anymore.
Emotions
Posted - 11/15/2008 : 11:07:58
