MyTherapy Discussion Forums

Š1995-2016 Phillip W. Long, M.D.

Schizophrenia Community

Nickname:	Password:
Save Password

All Forums

Schizophrenia: Specific Topics

Poetry

Dante

New Topic

Reply to Topic

Printer Friendly

Author

Topic

Page: of 16

Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)

1773 Posts
Gratitude: 268

Posted - 03/07/2009 : 03:10:44

I've been working on a project for a few weeks now interpreting Dante's Divine Comedy as Haiku and Haiku-inspired prose (kind of a pidgin Haibun) I'm on Canto 12 of Inferno and taking a break perhaps I'll post some of the cantos here in the mean time if you're interested you can read a few excerpts here www.wiresource.blogspot.com

Born in the 80's,
grew up in the 90's,
lost my mind at the Millenium.

Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)

1773 Posts
Gratitude: 268

Posted - 04/01/2009 : 01:57:19

So far I'm doing pretty good with Inferno. I've done 19 Cantos so far which means I'm nearing the home stretch on Volume 1. In the interest of getting some feedback I'm transcribing Canto 17 here. Once I've finished writing Inferno I will have to type the whole thing out onto my computer and include summaries before each Canto (which is traditional for this work) and send it to some folks who's opinions I value when it comes to Dante Scholarship and then with any amendments it's off to publishers and I get to start wall papering my home with rejection slips (or so I expect).

Here goes.

Canto 17

Summary:
Virgil and Dante have reached the inner edge of the Circle of Violence. As Virgil talks Greyon, the demon of Fraud, into flying them down to the next level of Hell Dante wanders off a little way and encounters some of the Usurers, big bankers who lent money at interest and gained in wealth at the expense of the impoverished.

The thing's human face
the look of an honest man
fraud's perversity

behind the kind face
the body of a serpent
hairy fore-arms, claws

it's complex patterns
draw distracted eyes to flesh
a scorpion's tail

this is our way down
from now on our path gets worse
my heart sinks still more

I turn, wander off
not too far, I hear Virgil
talking to Greyon

a small group of men
curled up and bent over
none I recognize

purses 'round their necks
hands fly up and down, no help
eyes fixed on their loot

Symbols on their bags
Citibank, AIG, Banks
That ruined the world

a banker glances
Goldman Sachs will be here soon
many more will fall

Virgil calls me back
Astride it he bidds me come
only sit in front

Greyon is upset
and his tail is poison tipped
I must climb aboard

swimming through the air
slowly, to the right we fly
I keep my eyes closed

We land in safety
the angry monster flies off
faster than he came

I hope this isn't too groovy for a forum dealing with psychosis. The Inferno is a very intense and unrelenting poem but it is only the first third of a major epic of Western poetry as well as social and religious commentary. After Dante the Pilgrim and his guide Virgil escape hell they arrive on the shores of Mount Purgatory and begin their upward climb towards Heaven. I'm looking forward to doing those next two books.

stile
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)

1627 Posts
Gratitude: 459
Very caring Very honest

Posted - 04/01/2009 : 15:31:52

Hi Chris, I am not well versed in poetry, even though I do own a copy of Dante's Inferno, I read it while having ECT and so my memory of it is wiped clean. The only thing I remember is that it was a challenging poem.

I say this so you know that I am not a good one to consult on poetry critiquing. But I thought what you wrote was brilliant. I like the fact that you make the story come to life vividly with an economy of words (necessary in a haiku but well done regardless). I also like the fact that it is highly readable and comprehensible where the original is, if I remember correctly, rather convoluted and difficult to understand.

Also, I like the contemporary references to the bailout scandal, it gives it a present context, and that is great. Overall i really enjoyed it, and if I was going to read Dante, I would want to read your version so yeah I would buy a poem like this.

-stile

FLMgirl
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)

3701 Posts
Gratitude: 361
Very caring

Posted - 04/01/2009 : 21:50:25

Hi Chris,

I also, like what you have done. Very Impressive. That is alot of work. It makes me want to read more. As Stile says, "it is highly readable". I also like that it doesn't make me feel like a dummy reading it. It is precise, fresh, and has drawn me in.

Keep working! I look forward to a finished product, with music!!!

-Leigh

Everyday is a winding road...

Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)

1773 Posts
Gratitude: 268

Posted - 04/01/2009 : 23:12:21

Thanks FLMgirl,

I'm still not certain how the music and the poetry will combine, if I'l read the cantos over top of the music sort of like an audio book or whether I'll release the music as ambient instrumental stuff that is only inspired by the work. We'll see how it unfolds I guess. The whole project is a bit of a surprise.

Born in the 80's,
grew up in the 90's,
lost my mind at the Millenium.

Zebra
Super Member (250+ posts)