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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/08/2009 : 02:28:37
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bicicling on Zeldox part 2:
I feel really high. I was kind of dizzy when I got off the bike, I just took a two hour long night ride across town because the weather is beautiful but now I'm all dizzy and like I said I kind of feel high.
I have a paper cut on my typing hand and it hurts to write so I'll probably spend some time lurking before I go to bed.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/29/2009 : 12:44:13
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ok so I brought this on myself. I went on Geodon about a month ago because I had to get off Seroquel. It was an effortless and positive transition period. I had read the withdrawal threads here but I had no choice I was getting extra pyramidal symptoms from the Seroquel and anyway I had run out of it and only had the prescription for Geodon my doctor had given me.
ok anyway after two days of being on the full dose (120mg) of Geodon with no more Seroquel in my system I developed an allergic reaction, a severe alleric reaction. I broke out in angry red hives all over my body I was getting akathisia and chest pains, insomnia, I was punching myself in the head the night before the really bad stuff happened.
I had to go to the hospital because of the hives and they told me to stop taking the drug immediately. I went to see my head shrinker and told him about this and he concluded rightly that it was an allergic reaction and switched me that day from Geodon to Perphenazine I'm on day two of no Geodon and last night I wanted to take a pipe to someone's head actually went so far as to bring a retractable baton outside and tried to pick a fight with some noisy jokers on a patio in the next building... I"M A FCUKING PACIFIST PEOPLE, I scared the living wits out of my wife and could have gotten seriously hurt also I broke my retractable baton and (thankfully) had to toss it in a dumpster.
I'm wooly headed and very irritable, noises outside the apartment are making me angry and I keep hearing this irregular pulsing, ringing sound in my ears. I have tinnitus anyway but this is different and thank God it's not my pulse because I'd have serious heart problems if it were.
Last night before the incident with the pipe I was reading through this thread and finding all the common symptoms of withdrawal. Some of these are repeats but I think it's important to catalogue this, these are words used in previous posts in this thread http://www.mytherapy.com/discussion/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=501&whichpage=1 to describe withdrawal from this drug please include any that I missed:
dizzy, vomiting, fainting, shaking, head ache, panic attack, blackouts, hot flashes, very sensitive to light, sweats and chills “tracers” no appetite I'm hot and cold at the same time Delirious Hallucinations Exhaustion feel like something is stuck in my throat insomnia sensitive to sudden sounds goose bumps depression tightness in the chest trouble breathing in and severe pain in my throat and chest feeling like I'm floating extreme anxiety colors are brighter paranoia irritable, facial tics twitching combative, unable to control outbursts Restless, unable to stand still, sit still, or concentrate Walking aimlessly in circles Skin crawling Convulsion Uncontrollable sobbing followed by insane rage and urge to violence slurred speech, dragging limbs, Shooting pain Tremors Parkinson's-like movements, Jaw clattering, eyelids twitching Could not walk and talk at same time had little appetite unable to chew diconnected feeling, sense of unreality, loss of time, horrible thoughts in my head very odd dreams hypo-mania
so far I've got the urge to violence, the disconnection from reality, the jumpiness at sudden noises and difficultu talking and writing properly, and feeling like I'm cottonbrained, also tremors and chest pain. At least the swelling and hives have gone away.
I'm not sure what to expect, I've got no choice but to go cold turkey. I brought this on myself because I knew about all the side effects and all the withdrawal symptoms but chose to take a gamble anyway. I am not proud, I am scared, I am supposed to go out of town today until thursday for my wedding anniversary.
ugh.
I agree with the people on here who have said this drug should be banned I also believe that the people who designed it and the people who run the company which makes it should be brought up on charges this drug is pure concentrated evil. I have had schizophrenia for ten years and this is the worst thing since psychosis. if anyone on here can help me with support and encouragement I really feel I could use it right now.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/29/2009 : 19:11:03
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I went for a walk today, I had to go three blocks to the bank and back, that was an interesting experience, interesting in the sense that I don't want to repeat it.
I'm totally out of it, feeling very disoriented like having a very bad fever. I have started to feel nauseus and even moving around my apartment is hard. I'm having a rough time right now because if I lay down I feel ill but if I sit up I feel disoriented, I'm typing this so that I can have something to do and to focus my attention. I feel terrible and this is only day two. I'm given to understand that the withdrawal lasts about a week and a half which means maybe ten more days of this or worse.
let this post stand as a testament to the evils of Geodon if your doctor wants you to go on this medication read this thread or google geodon withdrawal and make up your own mind. I made the wrong choice and now I'm paying for it.
Anarchy and Peace |
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hercules21
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
5726 Posts Gratitude: 435
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Posted - 08/29/2009 : 22:03:23
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This is awful news Chris.
How long were you on it exactly a month? I am hoping the withdrawals won't last too long.
I wanted to mention to you that Owlman said that Abilify is available in Canada starting in late September. So if you can hold on to the new med that they have put you on until then - there might be another option for you.
If you make a post in the withdrawal thread while this is happening you may get a response from some of the people who check in on that thread.
OK all for now.
Hercules. |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 03:07:36
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I was hoping you'd respond to this.
I woke up at midnight and had only been able to get snatches of sleep since then and they've all been fever dreams, not good.
Then a little while ago I started tripping out seeing patterns and stuff when I closed my eyes, just like my acid days I got up to go on the computer because I was afraid of keeping my wife awake and I'm seeing tracers on the screen, the mouse is doing some really trippy things and it's difficult to make sense of the keyboard I'm still feeling cottonbrained and getting pulses in my ears (thank God it's not my pulse) but at least for now I don't have pain in my chest.
I'll Xpost this to the withdrawal thread and see what happens I hear this sh!t can last up to a week and a half, this is coming on day three. at least I'm not nauseus any more. I just wish I didn't have nightmares I would ove to have a deep dreamless sleep that lasts all night the past few have been really hellish. Also it's very difficult to type words on this computer. colour and shade are very exaggerated and it's making things difficult.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 03:18:36
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Let me tell you something: the legend of Zeldox fcuking sucks.
of the list I created above I am or have already experienced the following:
dizzy, shaking, head ache, hot flashes, very sensitive to light, sweats and chills “tracers” I'm hot and cold at the same time Delirious Hallucinations Exhaustion feel like something is stuck in my throat insomnia sensitive to sudden sounds tightness in the chest trouble breathing in and severe pain in my throat and chest feeling like I'm floating colors are brighter irritable, combative, unable to control outbursts Restless, Convulsion Uncontrollable sobbing followed by insane rage and urge to violence slurred speech, Parkinson's-like movements, diconnected feeling, sense of unreality, horrible thoughts in my head very odd dreams
This is after 48+ hours, I'm going into day three as I write this.
I would also like to add clenched jaw to this list of horrors
I will try my best to continue to describe my withdrawal in the best detail I know how on this thread. This drug is a nightmare I can't wake up from.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 08:21:18
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Ok I woke up and I'm fully tripping balls. tracers and the cieling is moving around and things don't want to stay still. It's like coming down from LSD where you've still got presence of mind but you're still tripping balls. I'm enjoying it but my wife isn't. also it's very hard to write on a keyboard I wonder if the cottonheadedness will come back today or if that stage is past. please don't ever take this drug, ever.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 11:29:56
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hallucinations have gone away (thank God) I mean they were fun and all but if I was tripping all day or longer that woulds suck. I'm still dealing with hot and cold flashes all the time basically putting on and taking off a sweater all the time.
have the strongest urge to listen to the beach boys so I've got pet sounds playing on the headphones right now, it's a great album. still finding it hard to type but at least the keyboard isn't moving as I look at it.
feeling like there's a lump in my throat and pulsing in my ears it's like the drug trying to fight me or something. it's a little like trying to push a wild animal out of my body through my skin.
my hand is shaking
this is the worst trip I've ever been on...
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 16:41:19
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how long is this supposed to last anyway? I'm almost at the end of day 3 and I've got sweats and chills and crying jags luckily the rage has subsided and I'm not tripping right now I'm basically just indoors listening to records and sewing. I chose sewing because it focuses my attention and it's keeping me occupied in a really productive way.
my forehead is cold.
Anarchy and Peace |
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hercules21
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
5726 Posts Gratitude: 435
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Posted - 08/30/2009 : 23:55:54
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Hi Chris,
Keep posting. We are here to help you through this virtually if we can.
If it gets really bad see your doctor. Maybe he (I think you said it was Dr Long) can help you with something. Maybe he can't - I am just making a suggestion. If the nightmares keep continuing or if the insomnia proves rough I wouldn't hesitate to try a sleeping pill. They are designed for short term use - and many of our members take them for longer. But I see nothing wrong with taking them for a week or so. I have a supply next to my bed for tough nights. There are over the counter ones and also ones by prescription. Make a post here if you want any advice on what to take but your doctor should know.
I don't have any ideas or suggestions for what will make this any better. But I can offer some encouragement that the people on the withdrawal thread do say that it gets better eventually. So there is light at the end of the tunnel. Try to make it through each day at a time and one hour at a time if it gets really bad.
I will check in again just before I go to bed tonight and tomorrow to see if there are any updates. |
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Fruitcup (inactive)
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
2298 Posts Gratitude: 563
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Posted - 08/31/2009 : 01:01:49
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Hi Chris...
We are all here for you.
I would go to hospital if this is at all possible.
There is an end to all this ...sending strength.
Do you have anything to take PRN?
Pretend you have a really really bad flu.....
Sue |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/31/2009 : 02:22:31
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thanks both of you for the kind and encouraging words, my wife and I are just taking it a day at a time and I am indeed trying t treat this like a bad flu, the hallucinations only seem to come at night which is a blessing but I'm still having trouble sleeping. I wasn't so cotton headed and my temperature changes took longer today perhaps this is a sign that I'm starting to come out of it. in the mean time I'm looking for anything that is good for detoxification, any kinds of teas like Yerba Mate and Chamomile which I know are ok for my body and which can help flush out this drug I'm drinking between two and three litres of water a day to help flush it out and when there's nothing else to do indoors sewing and listening to my record collection is very soothing, well the sewing par is the records are loud. and that's good too.
thank God the rage has gone away that was a frightening and deeply regrettable night for me and my wife it turned into a completely different person and had no control over it at all.
Anarchy and Peace |
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/31/2009 : 02:34:22
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the ear pulsing is the worst, also I'm saying rotten things to people on yon intertubes I guess the rage hasn't totally gone away.
Anarchy and Peace |
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stile
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1627 Posts Gratitude: 459
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Posted - 08/31/2009 : 14:47:40
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Hey Chris, I am following this thread now. Sorry to hear about the horrendous experience you're having. I can only relate it to the time I went off Paxil, what a nightmare that was.
But not as bad as what you're going through.
Keep posting. And God speed.
-stile
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Chris
Amazing Member (1000+ posts)
1773 Posts Gratitude: 268
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Posted - 08/31/2009 : 15:00:14
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thanks stiles, it's getting better by degrees, today the hallucinations weren't as intense or as long lasting and I don't feel foggy headed though I still can't sleep through the night I've still got chills and hot flashes and the pulsing sensation in my head is the worst it's like there's something moving in my brain and it's wearing me down but I think the hardest parts are tapering away now. I walked to the starbucks a couple of blocks away this morning for a coffee and it wasn't as nightmarish as my trip to the bank the other day. I'm starting to feel nausea and dizziness but compared to what I've felt already it's been worse on me. this is day 4
Anarchy and Peace |
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