aeb48
Starting Member
1 Posts Gratitude: 3
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Posted - 08/22/2009 : 06:51:22
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I want to start by saying that I know this drug has proved a fabulous life-saver for many people so this is not an indiscriminate bad-mouthing of Seroquel. However, I have had a genuinely terrible experience with it and if I had been more clued up (or if my psychiatrist had been more aware) I may have been spared a lot of suffering and long term scars.
Two years ago I began treatment and assessment for major depression. It was suspected that I had either bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder. My moods were literally all over the place, almost minute to minute, and I was completely incapable of being on my own. I was on anti-depressants for a few years before this - Citalopram and then 20mg of Fluoxetine. Nothing really helped. Once my life completely fell apart and I ended up back at home with my parents at 24 years old (I had already gained a very prestigious university qualification by this stage) I was put on Seroquel - initially 25mg a day, then increasing up gradually. Instantly I suffered extreme drowsiness and used to sleep for at least 15 hours a day. My mouth was always dry, I had an uncontrollable appetite - especially for anything sweet - , I was intensely irritable and my brain was dulled all of the time.
Worse than this however, three weeks after I started on this drug I started cutting myself. This became more and more extreme to the point that I was cutting myself 2-3 times a day, drinking large amounts of alcohol, and completely retreating from the world. This went on for over a year. I was in intense therapy the whole time from a psychiatrist and a clinical pyschologist but began overdosing. I landed myself in the emergency department many times having fallen deeply unconscious with severely irregular heart beats. Generally life got much much worse.
I had assumed this was a natural worsening of my condition. However, as therapy began to make some small improvements, I made a few huge changes and decided that I was going to cut the Seroquel. Not an advisable move without medical advice on the whole, but within a day or two of stopping, my personality came back, my urge to self harm more or less disappeared, I was alert and dynamic, I lost a few kilos of weight and other improvements. I also suffered severe insomnia for a couple of months but it was worth it.
In retrospect, it was only once I started on Seroquel that my really severe and crazy symptoms began. It just seems too much of a coincidence to me to dismiss Seroquel as a causative factor in my severe illness. Unfortunately, however much better I may be now, and I am about to start training as a doctor, I will have multiple, horrible scars all over my arm as a result of the self harm. A constant reminder.
The point of this post is just to give any of you that may be on Seroquel and experiencing any of the above symptoms the opportunity to question when the problems began. If they predate the Seroquel then the drug may be innocent but, if not, talk to your doctor. It may well be the drug causing it.
Just don't take drugs blindly as I did. This is hard when you are deeply depressed and have given up - you will do whatever you are told if it may make life easier. Please keep engaged though. My life is unrecognisable nowadays compared to my bad times and I would hate anyone else to be unnecessarily stuck.
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