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fleurette
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
3282 Posts
Gratitude: 292
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 Posted - 01/18/2007 : 15:25:59
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i'm coming out of my shell, after 31 years of living.
now i can talk to people for the first time. and make small talk and talk to strangers.
i think it has to do with the stelazine that i got switched to.
it's about time, i hated being shy.
"Christians don't tell lies they just go to church and sing them"
A.W. Tozer |
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| Chunkybeefsoup
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
2353 Posts
Gratitude: 412
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Posted - 01/22/2007 : 15:50:58
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| Fleurette, so glad to hear that you've "come out of your shell." I know that it isn't easy. I was the most introverted person in both of my high schools. After getting over this, I started to talk to everybody and to my delight, a lot of them responded. It's definitely not easy and takes a lot of practice. However, that being said, it's just good to be yourself and to be comfortable wherever you are and whomever you're with. As long as you like and love yourself, everyone will too! This is a very healthy attitude to have - loving yourself. Because even if people don't accept you, as long as you accept you, that's building a lot of self-esteem and confidence. People don't shy away from outer appearance - it's all in the inside. Trust me. I used to have such a big problem with my outer appearance. I realized later through a lot of therapy and counselling that you must love yourself and realize that you're a wonderful human being. Love, Cindy |
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| Vickytoria
Super Member (250+ posts)
524 Posts
Gratitude: 138
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Posted - 01/29/2007 : 15:08:13
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Funny, since starting loxapine and fluanxol i've been more recalcitrant and paranoid and depressed. I wonder if stelazine will do any miracles for me.
The best drug for social phobia and agoraphobia for me was zyprexa. But I gained 60lbs in a year or a year and half, and then it just stopped working, with full blown delusions again.
"To comprehend the nectar
Requires sorest need."
--Emily Dickinson
http://www.schizophreniadigest.com/
http://www3.telus.net/vywrite/
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| Flint
Full Member (100+ posts)
109 Posts
Gratitude: 21
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Posted - 01/30/2007 : 11:01:21
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Hello fleurette,
I too am slowly coming out of my shell. The shell in which I would'nt let anyone in.
I'm finding it easier to make very minor small talk with strangers, but it has to be brief because I'll get nervous.
So for me going to the bank or safeway is less stressful for me because all I have to say is : "Hello, how are you today". They reply : " Good how are you?"? I say "good thanks"
and that's it.
If I'm stuck in a social situation in which I have to talk for more than 30 seconds I get anxious.
But at the same time there are a handful of people who I could sit and talk to for long periods of time because they don't intimidate me.
I too hate/hated being shy.
Flint |
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| fleurette
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
3282 Posts
Gratitude: 292
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Posted - 01/30/2007 : 14:29:38
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hello flint,
i'm glad u too r coming out of ur shell. although for me it wasn't that i wouldn't let anyone in, i was just shy with people that i'm not super close with and in large groups. i have always let my family in my personal thoughts and feelings. i hope things get better for u, so that u don't get so nervous talking with strangers for more than 30 secs. i'm also glad that u have intimate friends to talk to for long periods of time. i totally understand how it feels to hate being shy.
fleurette
"Christians don't tell lies they just go to church and sing them"
A.W. Tozer |
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| Chunkybeefsoup
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
2353 Posts
Gratitude: 412
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Posted - 01/30/2007 : 15:15:06
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I remember how it was throughout high school. There were so many people whom I wanted to talk to but couldn't because I was so shy back then. I was an introvert with low confidence and self-esteem. It can't get any worse than this...so many nights I would lay awake dreaming that I could "come out of my shell" and just talk to people. I tried everything, including using a half can of hairspray every day and lots and lots of makeup and jewellery. I didn't impress anyone, in fact, I was picked on a lot. Nothing physically violent, but definitely violent to my feelings. There was one dance that I went to and I liked to dance. Practically everyone moved away from me when I was dancing. I felt like such a loser.
Grade 12, I started to hit the nightclubs with my "friends." Nobody wanted to dance with me, so I danced alone. There was this one guy who really didn't like me. He said I looked like such a fool when I danced. That really made me feel bad. Sure I looked great, but looks can only get you so far. Really creepy guys always came up to me and started to hit on me. I was so disgusted. My moral was low and I just picked anybody who wanted to dance with me. Even I had standards when it came to these people. I'm very lucky that I didn't get raped.
In December of 1992, I had a psychological breakdown. I refused to go to school and take my exams. I just wanted to stay in bed all day and night. I didn't want to step outside my house. I was disgusted of the way I looked and felt. So, this is when all the counselling started. After six months of intensive treatment, I felt good about myself. Life was good and then after two years, I turned psychotic. That's when I was diagnosed with Catatonic Schizophrenia and then later, Bipolar, and now, Schizoaffective Disorder. Take care everyone. Love, Cindy |
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| fleurette
Incredible Member (2000+ posts)
3282 Posts
Gratitude: 292
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Posted - 02/13/2012 : 16:01:31
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Since typing those messages, I think that I go in cycles of shyness and periods of more extraversion.
Some would advise to expose ourselves to more and more people and eventually expand our circle of friends but I believe it is the quality of friends that make a difference not the quantity, only.
Besides, people go through different life stages of work, marriage, having kids and retirement so those differences would naturally bring different kinds of friends that you would be comfortable being yourself with.
In our western world, we are encouraged to be extraverted and to be confident in every social situation but that can be close to impossible for some of us and I don't think there is anything wrong with being a introvert as long as the aloneness doesn't make us depressed.
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| ShrinkingViolet
Starting Member
21 Posts
Gratitude: 19
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Posted - 02/23/2012 : 13:57:18
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| I'm glad to meet someone else who takes Stelazine and finds it works better than anything else! I take 8 mg. Stelazine and about 75 mg. Seroquel, as well as .5 mg. clonazepam. I find that with the clonazepam I can make "small talk" quite well, but don't really want to get any closer than that to others, except for my husband. I'm afraid that they'll find out about the sz. That's why I like my yoga class, 'cause there is minimal social intercourse, just "Hi, how're ya doing today" etc. However, when invited for coffee afterwards, I made up an excuse. |
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not as shy as i used to be
