A suicide attempt is a clear indication that something is gravely wrong in a person’s life. No matter the race or age of the person; how rich or poor they are, it is true that most people who die by suicide have a mental or emotional disorder. The most common underlying disorder is depression, 30% to 70% of suicide victims suffer from major depression or bipolar (manic-depressive) disorder. Although they may not call prevention centers, people considering suicide usually do seek help; for example, nearly three-fourths of all suicide victims visit a doctor in the four months before their deaths, and half in the month before. http://www.pigeonsandracingpigeons.com
I wanted to kill myself because I wanted to punish the people I thought had hurt me, because I felt like a bad person who should be punished, and mainly because I wanted the pain to end.
The teaching I received was that the pain I was in would not end by suicide; that kept me from any serious attempt at suicide.